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Hello,
I am Cristina Pettersen C, I am a Holistic Life Coach, a Healer, and a big advocate of self-love. After years of challenges and low self-esteem, I finally got to the point of giving myself time to heal, using all tools and therapies available. Working in my mindset was paramount in order for me to connect with my essence, feel confident, and achieve my goals, and this is why I have created these interviews. To provide you with tools and information, to help us move through different challenges, grow, and become aware of our power to heal and achieve our goals.
Today, I had the pleasure of meeting and interviewing Kimberly Koste, a relationship coach, with a Master’s degree in Clinical Psychology. Kimberly is an expert in healing your heart, dealing with difficult people, and ensuring you and your children thrive despite what you’re going through.
Tell me about yourself. Who is Kimberly Koste?
Answer: Many years ago I went through a very hard break up and I went through my own self-discovery, and whatever was holding me back from having healthy relationships. I discovered conscious coupling and became a conscious coupling coach. After working with people as a social worker for so long and then having had my own challenges with divorce, I decided that the people I really wanted to work with are parents dealing with difficult exes. Oftentimes parents did not break up properly or completely and this is something that I am very passionate about. Digging into the relationship dynamics between people who are co-parenting.
Now, we know why this is so near and dear to your heart, tell me: how can parents with difficult exes use this in their own lives?
Answer: Oftentimes my clients are very tender, and when we are at our most vulnerable and open after a divorce and disappointment it is a great time to look at the limiting beliefs and a great opportunity to grow beyond where you have been. There is so much to work with these parents, so much that didn’t work and they are into this parenting role that leaves them no time to process.
I teach parents how to keep their sanity which is to manage triggers and stress and overwhelm of having someone who is constantly working against them as well as how to communicate with that person better.
I also teach them how to teach their kids the same, as they are also dealing with a difficult parent. So how do they manage their feelings and how do they communicate with that person?
Three challenges that parents face when it comes to co-parenting with difficult exes
Answer: Their biggest challenge is the anxiety from constantly being triggered and the constant stress and overwhelm from dealing with this person. I hear some challenging and sad stories of what these people are going through with their exes.
Another challenge is that they don’t know how to talk to them. Their exes always win the arguments, they don’t know how to get a bit of what they want, because they are so good at manipulating and bullying and getting it their way.
The third challenge is that they are worried about their kids to the point of affecting their health.
How do you help people overcome these obstacles
Answer: We work with communication skills and techniques to deal with difficult people. But these don’t really begin until you deal with the stress and anxiety. So this is the first thing we work with people, their limiting beliefs, thoughts, assumptions and everything that leads up to the negative feelings, stress, and anxiety, to realize how it is so difficult to set boundaries and to make sure you never again attract someone like that into your life. I have a free video guide that get people that gives people a great taste of how I work and gives them a 5 step process so they can better understand their triggers and start implementing the 5 steps for some of that relief.
Then we master communication, once they have calmed down their emotional system we come to find out what kind of ex or difficult is their ex and then we address the communication that is best for that personality.
Then we focus on their kids, and what they are learning about their own stress and triggers that they can teach their kids and they can teach without bad-mouthing the other person.
How can people find out more about you
Answer: The free Video Guide is at http://kk-coaching.com/
And joining my Facebook Group is the best way to find out all the news I have. I always have a workshop on the horizon, challenges, and free support. And every two weeks I do a support group where people can share and get support from the community.
https://www.facebook.com/groups/DifficultConsciousParenting/
Thank you for reading, thank you for taking the time to learn and take action to improve your health, and in this case, your relationship with a difficult ex, to support your health and your kids’ health.
Blessings,
Cristina Pettersen
MSc, Confidence and Holistic Life Coach & Healer
PS: If you want to join a private community on Facebook to get resources, inspiration to improve your confidence, self-love, work on your holistic health, and more, you can do so here:
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